Gratitude

Original post from: Friday, September 12, 2008

We are trying to teach my daughter Kylah to say a few words at this point in her early development. She's 15 months old now and already in the habit of repeating many of the simple words she hears repeated like "no", "yes", "bottle", and a few others that I have no idea where she could have heard them. As parents, we often hear words that more than likely really aren't words. Like the other day an airplane was flying overhead, and I just know she said "Boeing 747". Now how does she know that's a Boeing? Truth is she doesn’t. We sometimes hear what we want to hear. Not that I wanted to hear those specific words, but that I've created in my own mind a connection between what I perceive and what I hope to be signs of intelligence.

The two words that I have yet to hear strung together are "Thank You". As parents, we both try. I know her grandparents try. We give her a bottle after she stands at the refrigerator door crying, hand stretched out and crying. And we say to her; "now what do you say, Kylah? Say 'Thank you'. But it never comes. Crying stops, she's got her bottle now. She's content, and walks off in the other direction.

The idea behind getting children to say "thank you" is probably as old as time itself. Parents and grandparents, and teachers, and the like, have been trying to teach us to say "thank you". To show a little gratitude. As I think about it now, I'm not teaching Kylah to show gratitude to me for "my" benefit. I give to her freely, without condition, and likely always will. But it is for her own benefit, that I want her to develop a sense of gratitude and respect for life in general. It pleases me more to know that she is grateful, than it does to be appreciated for what I have done. It's about humility. It is often an under-valued and overlooked characteristic in society, but we like it when we see it.

It's amazing how that works... I set out to "teach" and learned something in the process.